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Archive for the ‘Child abuse’ Category

A life is a life is a life is not a guinea pig…

Posted by Henric C. Jensen on June 21, 2006



“The solution is to get enough known survivors of childhood physical and sexual abuse for two groups. Ensure there is a good mix of both types in each group. (Example. If the total amount of participants is 20—then two groups of 10).One group is the control group, that group gets anything and everything medically available to assist with the healing process.

The other group is the test group. This group receives no medical help at all.

Track both groups until each study member has reached the predetermined age of adulthood. (lets say you track the groups from the age of 14 until the participants have all reached the age of 25).” From Shari’s Blog.

From my comment: “In theory, I like your idea – and yet find it quite horrible, because it leaves 10 abuse victims with no help whatsoever, and for what? To see if they turn into abusers themselves. I don’t like human experiments.”

The thing is we already have tons of statistics that tell us, abused kids run a 50% risk of growing up to be abusive adults. So such an experiment would, in my mind be not only rather moot, but cruel. It’s like forcing dogs to smoke to see if they get cancer – when we already know that smoking causes cancer. Rather than conduct a potentially cruel experiment on humans, we should instead use the money, that we would have used on that experiment, on building networks of recovery – it is a tested and tried reality that those who have themselves built recovery from abuse, drug addiction, crime etc, are the ones that have the most to give those who are still in the clutches of their illness.

A better solution would be to require all teenage and adult abuse victims to attend 12 Step Meetings for Abuse Victims. This should start the moment they are identified as abuse victims – 12 Step Meetings have a recovery rate of 80-95%, compared to traditional therapy which only reaches 30-50%. And what is even better – it’s FREE of charge, which means there is not cost to Society.

Shalom!

Posted in Child abuse | Leave a Comment »

First and Second Hand Assortment of Parents

Posted by Henric C. Jensen on May 27, 2006


“While I have proposed some sort of testing program to help not necessarily weed out the prospective parents who are found to be a high risk to abuse their children, but to find a solution before they and their children or spouse become another statistic, both Holly and ShadowBear have opposed that.” From Shari’s Blog

I honestly think that Mandatory Parenting School – including psych evaluations, does solve the problem, especially if those psych evaluations are being followed by f.i mandatory enrollment in Treatment of and Recovery from the effect of having been raised in abusive families themselves, when such is detected. And it would do so without raising the issues of ethics and “where do we draw the line” in terms of what can and cannot be tested, without us playing G-d. The right to have children (which is not a Human Right – not even a Civil Right) doesn’t come with the genitalia – exactly because children are not ‘things’, but living beings.

Raising awareness, presenting a way out and offering people a solution as to what they can do to earn the right to have children and DEMANDING that they do that, before having children is reasonable and in my mind a lot more productive and constructive than genetic tests to detect potential child abusers. By targeting ALL prospective Parents, and making it something ALL people have to do in order to become Parents, we don’t make the mistake of dividing people into classes – First and Second Hand Assorment of Parents. And we would raise the parenting skills level for ALL.

It really is no difference between this and what is already being done in regards to couples seeking artificial insemination or who want to adopt a child – the difference is that with genetic screening, you end up with no way out – “You are genetically unfit to be a parent.” And that might not be the case at all, it might simply be that there is a predisposition or a possibility that with the correct intervention can be ‘corrected’.

One of my favorite bloggers raised an interesting question in one of his blog entries about a week ago – “If you could go back in time and meet Hitler before WWII, and kill him – would you?” He then went on and told a story about one such Brittish soldier, who during the WWI actually had the chance, but chose, out of mercy not to kill a German soldier (who happened to be A.Hitler).

Would I? No. I would not. The end doesn’t justify the means. Murdering someone or depriving them of their Free Will can never be right, no matter what the motives are. That is to reduce them to something less than a Human Being.

Shalom!

Posted in Child abuse | Tagged: , , | Leave a Comment »

Mandatory Parenting School…

Posted by Henric C. Jensen on May 24, 2006


“I guess what I am trying to say is this, there are no reasons on earth for people who wish to become parents as long as the few who may inadvertently tar and feather that group are helped and given the life skills they need to stop the cycle of abuse, once and for all.” (From the blog The Slush and Mush Pile)

Oh, I am all for Mandatory Parenting School, I am just not very keen on ‘genetic screening’. Genetic screening for any other reason than hereditary debiltating illnesses sooner or later leads to screening out because of gender, sexual orientation, intelligence, hair-color, physical skills etc… Genetic screening will only harm the Human Race.We already gene-modify plants and animals, and that has resulted in our vegetables being less nutritious and our animals being unable to procreate normally as well as in some cases carry their own weight.

But Mandatory Parenting School would take care of the problem fine, I think.

I have seen enough ‘out-of-line-parents’, to think that demanding all 18 year olds go through 2-3 years of Parenting School with psych-evaluations along the way, and an age limit for getting kids. No-one under the age of 25 should be allowed to become parents, in fact I am not sure anyone should be allowed to marry before the age of 23, so that when they are finally, certificate in hand, old enough to become parents, they have already been married for a couple of years and have established a working relationship. And as a final exam they should have to care for one of those life-like baby dolls for at least a year. If they manage to do that without as much as a forgotten diaper, they might be up to the task.

Shalom!

Posted in Child abuse, Parenting | Tagged: , , | Leave a Comment »

Congratulations, you just killed…

Posted by Henric C. Jensen on May 22, 2006


Beethoven….a friend of mine just posted a blog on the Topic of child abuse, arranged marriages and how we as a civilized society should deal with the same…and while I understand exactly how she feels as I am from an abusive family myself, and all that – it is a fact that if my parents had been prevented from having children I would not exist. And if my parents hadn’t been abusive I would not be the person I am today.

“I mean come on, we have medical tests which will tell us the sex of the unborn baby; whether that unborn baby has a serious medical condition that requires immediate medical intervention. Why are there no policies in place for spotting people who might be dangerous as parents. We owe it to ourselves and the generations that follow to find this cure for abuse and nip it in the bud.”

Yeah, it would very nice if we could look into the future, either through tests or through some psychic method, and see exactly what kind of people babies are going to turn into, so that we could prevent abuse, murder, violence and other horrors. But it wouldn’t be ethical.

My parents had a Free Will – they could make a choice to abuse or not to abuse. They chose to abuse – and I suffered as a result of that. But it also brought me some blessings I would not have gained had my parents not abused me. Compassion – I have the ability to feel and show compassion. Emotional Intelligence – I am highly sensitive and intuitive when it comes to feelings and the finer points of social interaction. On top of all my other skills, such as verbal expression through writing an speaking, I have a passion and a ‘no-nonsense’ attitude towards issues of bullying, child abuse, human rights and Justice, that makes me a good advocate on those issues.

I doubt I would have had that passion or that no-nonsense attitude if I had not been born.

For every step we take towards using our knowledge to curb Free Will, we also take a step towards a society where in the end only those who have curbed everybody else have any Free Will, and I really don’t think that is a Society we want. I think it is a good thing that we cannot detect child abusers, rapists, murderers and war criminals through genetic tests, because if we erraddicate those people, we might end up erraddicating a future Beethoven or Einstein.

Shalom!

Posted in Child abuse | Tagged: | 2 Comments »

 
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