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Archive for the ‘Satire’ Category

Fundamantalist Islamic Hypocrisy

Posted by Henric C. Jensen on September 2, 2007


Mohammad Controversy Images

Western media outlets are fearful of provoking extremist Islamic retaliation, thus they have largely avoided printing the Mohammed cartoons, though it must be remembered that the over-reaction is the problem, not the provocation. These cartoons are not racist – they satirise the Islamic religion and its prophet, not Muslim people.

Religious fundamentalism has been a cause of prejudice and violence for centuries. The violent reactions to these cartoons say more about extremist intolerance than about blasphemy – protesters in London held placards reading “EXTERMINATE THOSE WHO MOCK ISLAM”. It is the protesters who are the problem here, and the media should not give in to such intimidation.

Lars Vilks Roundabout Dog

You know, I am a religious man, and I don’t get the problem with religious satire. I never have. First of all there will always be people who for one reason or other find it amusing to mock religion and religious figures. No big deal. Would I find similar cartoons of Moses or Avraham offensive? No I wouldn’t.

The reactions around the world to the images above, among fundamentalist Islamists, are not only rather “over the top” they are only confirming peoples worst prejudices about Islam and Muslims as aggressive, intolerant, and quite imperialistic (as in “wanting to take over the world”).

They are also quite hypocritical, as the same fundamentalist Islamists have no qualms about publishing their own versions of mocking and satirizing images aimed at Jews, Israel, The US, Europe, the UK etc…

It’s a clear case of not being able to take what they dish out.

Further, demanding censorship (or else…) in democratic states like Denmark, Sweden and the UK, is nothing less than an attempt to control those states from the out-side through blatant blackmail.

You simply cannot demand that sovereign states cater to your religious sensitivities, especially not if you at the same time ignore the sensitivities of others.

It would have been a whole other matter if those images had been depicting Muslims or Arabs in a general manner – just as it is with Anti-Semitic images in the Arab World, which portray Jews in the same manner as in the Third Reich, but those images are of the Prophet Mohammad, and last time I looked the Prophet Mohammad was not the entire Muslim or Arab World population.

Posted in Double Standards, Freedom of Press, Satire | Leave a Comment »

search:sick puppies partition

Posted by Henric C. Jensen on July 22, 2007


I have had one of those funny searches’ days on my blog today and yesterday.

What are people looking for when they type in “sick puppies partition“? Puppies cut in half? How to partition puppies before eating them? Wondering if their hard drive is sick and need special treatment? Really – people make some funny searches.

The day before yesterday someone wanted to see “bear fighting a dragon drawings“…okaaaay…it is true that I sometimes feel like I am fighting a dragon with multiple heads when going against anti-semitism, but what makes people think they will find drawings specifically depicting a bear fighting a dragon? What runs through peoples’ minds when they type in searches like that?

Since you so vigorously searched the net for it, here you go – compliments of my Wife:

Bear fighting a Dragon

This one is intriguing: “religious fundamentalism UN resolution” – I get the religious fundamentalism and the UN resolution – but where did the combination of those two originate inside someone’s head?

It sure would be wonderful if there was a UN resolution against Religious Fundamentalism. Then I could just walk up to my fanatical Xtian neighbor and say: “there’s a UN Resolution against you!” every time she tries to pander her religion to me and demand that she comply with the resolution. We could solve the problem of religious infighting by bunching the Fundamentalist Islamists, the Fundamentalist Xtians, Literalist Jews, Quirky Hindus, Marxist Stupidists and Annoying Atheists together and send them on the next NASA flight to Mars, all in compliance with a UN Resolution.

Posted in Satire | Tagged: , | Leave a Comment »

Obama is a Muslim! Obama is a Muslim!! Oy vey!

Posted by Henric C. Jensen on July 22, 2007


Associated Press has revealed that Senator Barack Hussein Obama, Democratic candidate for President of the United States, attend a Catholic school in Indonesia registered as a Muslim, further clouding the issue of where Obama was schooled in Indonesia and when. Obama, by his own admission in books that he has written, has said that he attended a Catholic school and a Muslim school while living in Indonesia with his atheist mother and Muslim stepfather. But now that Fox News reported that Obama may have been indoctrinated in Islamic teachings while attending the Muslim school in Indonesia…


Oh my G-d! Barack Obama is a Muslim! He’s running for President! The Qu’ran is being used to swear Congressmen into Office, Hindu Prayers are said to open the Senate!

Homosexuals can legally marry in Massachusetts, gay people sneak in and out of the White House…! Muslims are allowed to fly with American passenger jets, Palestinians have legal visas to visit the States! Help!

Why isn’t anyone doing anything?? Why, Why, Why? Shouldn’t here be laws against such things?

Posted in Satire | Tagged: , , | 3 Comments »

Ladies and Gentlemen, we have a Problem.

Posted by Henric C. Jensen on July 11, 2007


They have governments in every country, they own the majority of the land, make up the bulk of each nations financial structures, legislative bodies and educational systems. They control the media, the medical care systems and the religious doctrine. Where ever one turns, there they are, involving themselves in everything from simple business to complex political decisions.

Ladies and Gentlemen, we have a serious problem on our hands – a problem that reaches out to us for a solution. It is clear from all the matters I enumerated above, that not one single area in our Community is safe from them. The Question I ask of you, my esteemed colleagues and fellow Citizens, what are we to do with this problem? How do we best handle this urgent puzzle?

I speak of course of the Gentile Problem.

It is necessary to curb this violent, scheming and quite reproductional prolific race, before they overrun us completely. Just look at our schools and workplaces – they demand equal rights for their religious beliefs and unions for their workers – soon they will be demanding that we allow them to marry our sons and daughters!

I suggest we create legislation that will effectively bar them from any association with us, in schools, workplaces, business establishments, religious congregations, academic institutions and administrative responsibilities as well as the media.

Knowing how cunning and manipulative the Gentile is I envision this as a three step solution, that will secure the complete segregation between them and us, eventually they will cease to be a threat to us altogether:

1. To secure our educational system, we need to take control over our schools and higher educational institutions and the media through re-locating their students, teachers and media employees to more suitable institutions where ever such can be found.

2. By reducing their access to our business establishments, workplaces and religious communities, they will be forced to seek their livelihoods and religious sustenance in more appropriate establishments.

3. Finally, ladies and gentlemen, to cleanse our society from this nefarious scourge taht is the Gentile, we need to accomplish a permanent and logical solution. As a result of step 1 and 2 they have lost most of their means for support, so to offer them work in establishments created specifically for this purpose is not only a necessary measure, but in fact a mercy.

Now I don’t pretend to believe that this will be a simple task to accomplish, nor that it will be easy in its execution – doubtless many will protest and object to these measures, but my dear colleagues, with determination, steadfastness and absolute dedication it can and will be fulfilled.

Posted in Satire | Tagged: , | 3 Comments »

How to Manipulate and Confuse People…

Posted by Henric C. Jensen on June 25, 2007


into doing your dirty work.

  1. find a really juicy piece of gossip, “news”, and/or blog entry – look anywhere in the Net if you have to.
  2. find a discussion forum post that attempts to make a point through exaggerated violent and threatening language in which the author explains that the exaggeration is for illustration purposes only, and not intended to be anything else.
  3. find the biggest picture of the Blog Entry Author and use that as an illustration for a news post on a News Story about the two items you found in step 1 and 2 – make sure you post in Trebuchet 8pt, so it’s hard to read.
  4. send out email messages to all your friends and their friends in a site that has more than 6 million members telling them how the Blog Author and the Exaggerator is threatening their personal security. Make sure that you have your Martyr Cap on, so people will forget to separate the two issues from each other out of sympathy for you and your closest friend.
  5. conveniently edit out the explanation from the Exaggerator’s comment when you speak about it – so people get the impression that there really was a genuine threat expressed.
  6. as people gather to eat from your hand use the Chicken Little approach and fuel their fears.
  7. Used expressions such as “these people”, “gang”, “thugs” etc, so it seems that you’re speaking of MANY, and not just #1 and #2.
  8. This is guaranteed to make all who see your news so confused that they will note it or digg it out of pure misunderstanding.
  9. mix in large amounts of garbled conspiracy theories. Sit back and watch the chaos evolve and character assassinations run their course.

Posted in Bullying, Satire | 6 Comments »

The Most Conspiratory Conspiracies of them all

Posted by Henric C. Jensen on August 11, 2006


The world is in shambles, people are suffering in every country, the governments only tell us what they want us to know, and they rig the elections so the “right” guy will win every time, gay marriages are being named acceptable by the g’dless atheists, there’s death and starvation in Africa, nuclear weapons in Pakistan and India, political oppression in China, Palestinian refugee camps in Lebanon, Jordan, and off course in Palestine. Russia’s biggest oil company is bancrupt, mosques are being burnt in Scandinavia, the Intenational Air travel is being threatened by terrorists that are really hired by CIA and MI5 to hide that Israel wants to expand all the way to China, Iran refuses to comply with the UN, the US refuses to pay their dues to the UN, Kofi Annan is a thief, the children in Sudan are dying, countless animals are being used for experiments, the vegetables we eat have lost more than 2/3 of their nutrients, the hosts of ACH actually believe that there is such a thing as jewish nukes, the media in Canada is owned by Zionists. Mordechai Vanunu was an Israeli plant, to feed the World false information about those Jewish Nukes, the Forrests are burning in St. Petersburg, and your mother lied to you about masturbation…of course all this must be the doings of a World Wide Jewish Plot! What else could it be?! It’s all the Evil Jews’ fault!But of course you can’t believe a word of this, because a Jew said it.

Shalom!

Posted in Jewish People, Satire | Leave a Comment »

 
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